Do you smile every time you hear a certain song, or light up when you see a certain old friend? They are both what I like to call sparks of happiness.
We need it now more than ever to succeed despite overwhelming challenges, distractions, and current events. Unfortunately, as I wrote in my last book, “Mentally strong leader” There are some days when these moments are difficult to achieve.
The key is to bring more sparks of happiness into your life — not by accident, but by choice.
it takes Mental strength And discipline to embrace perspectives and make choices that can help bring you happiness, especially when negative feelings and thoughts hijack you.
Mentally strong people rely on these five phrases, which can do little for them Bursts of resilience and Create sparks of happiness.
1. “It's not what I've lost, it's what I still have.”
In times of adversity, it's easy to focus on what's gone. You may have lost time, money, or resources when something went wrong with that work project. Or you lost your identity when you were laid off from work. Or you lost a hangout friend when your friend moved across the country.
Remember to focus on what you still have that makes a profound difference. consciously Practice gratitude improves well-being, research He appears.
In the above situations, for example, you may be grateful for valuable ideas, loved ones with whom you can spend quality time, a new travel destination, as well as… Friendship You can continue to cultivate long distances.
2. “There is no such thing as a perfect path.”
When you second-guess your chosen path or lament that everything didn't go as you hoped, you may get stuck in a negative cycle.
The truth is, there will always be unexpected twists and turns. It's easier to find happiness when you accept the imperfect path and overcome obstacles along the way.
Think of an accomplishment or result that made you happy. You've probably dealt with some adversity to get there.
3. “So be it”
When you're feeling down and someone tells you to “just leave it alone,” it can make you even more upset. It's also bad advice, because you probably won't be able to ignore what happened and how you felt.
On the other hand, you can say to yourself: “So be it.” This means using a form of epistemology acceptanceIt is the surest way out of the downward spiral.
Don't try to eliminate a negative event from your psyche or change how you feel about it. Let her sit there. Acknowledge and accept that your emotions are legitimate reactions and focus on them How you will move forward in a productive way.
4. “Big picture, small step”
When we struggle in the face of setbacks, we can lose perspective. Small challenges can suddenly seem big.
Saying “big picture, small step” to yourself does two things:
- It reminds you of the ultimate goal or vision of the life you want to live and who you want to be. When you think of a setback in the context of the big picture, it shrinks.
- This can help you identify something small you can do to get back on the path of progress and positivity. This first action can lead to another small step of hope, which leads to another, and so on.
5. “Adversity creates beliefs, not consequences.”
Think of this as your own ABC statement, inspired by ABC model In cognitive behavioral therapy. The idea is to remind yourself that adversity does not automatically mean negative outcomes.
The ultimate outcome of adversity is determined by how you respond to it, and the beliefs you form because of it.
For example, would you believe that A A job interview that didn't go well Was it an unrecoverable disaster that clearly demonstrates that you are a failure? Or will you believe that it is an opportunity to learn and an obstacle that you will overcome, as happened in other situations in the past?
Remember: “I'll be happy when…” is a trap
It's easy to get caught up in thinking about that happiness It's a destination, if you can just make more money, or achieve something specific, then You will be happy.
You might say to yourself, “I'll be happy when I finally get this promotion“, for example, or “If I could wear these old jeans, I'd be happier.” Meanwhile, you let the joy go unnoticed as you keep your head down, grinding.
Mentally strong people engage in what I call “grinding“, a practice at the intersection of gratitude and mindfulness. It allows you to notice and acknowledge your gratitude for the small positives, even in difficult moments.
He encourages you to do so Draw happiness Of finding and experiencing joy in the world around you, now, every day.
Scott Mautz He is a famous speaker, trainer and LinkedIn Learning Coach. He is a former senior executive of Procter & Gamble, where he ran many of the multi-billion-dollar company's largest businesses. He is the author ofThe Mentally Strong Leader: Building Habits to Productively Regulate Your Emotions, Thoughts, and BehaviorsFollow him LinkedIn.
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